The Players Corner Archive

Here is my problem - I love Ta'Vaalor and I'm planning to move there. My husband thinks it's boring and prefers to live in Wehnimer's. We argue about this constantly. He thinks if I really love him, I would want to be where he is the happiest. I think he should think about my happiness. What do you think?

Torn In Ta'Vaalor

Dear Torn,
Gads, this is a tough one...and I'm sure it must cause added stress for you both. I tend to think that all relationships need a healthy dose of compromise in order to survive.

I would suggest that you each spend time in the places that you prefer, and then make it a priority to spend time with each other. You could show him all the special places in Ta'Vaalor that you enjoy, and then spend a little time with him in the Landing. The time you spend apart could make you appreciate each other all the more... of course, you could stumble across some native of Ta'Vaalor and... well, that's another letter.

I think you have to do what's best for YOU and hopefully, everything else will fall into place.

Caels, any words of wisdom from the male perspective?

Good Luck,
Summer
reg

Mike reg

I agree with the compromise ideal Summerlyn, but some people may not be willing to compromise (like Zan ).

If he feels that you should stay with him in Wehnimer's, and believes that you should stay because it makes him happy, then perhaps you need to subtly point out his selfishness. Do not be blunt about it or sparks may fly. Use that womanly charm you are all given and sneak inside his defenses. (Speak not a word Summerlyn!!)

Before you go pointing at his self-centered theories, make sure that you yourself are not being selfish, I'd hate to make you look like a hypocrite. If all else fails, then perhaps he is not worth the headaches he is causing...

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Caels Onae'Rae
AIM : Lord Caels

Emails:
caels_onaerae@hotmail.com
caels@gsplayers.com reg

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Caels Onae'Rae
AIM : Lord Caels

Emails:
caels_onaerae@hotmail.com
caels@gsplayers.com reg

Rysh, the compromiser reg

quote:

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Originally posted by Summerlyn:
Dear Summer,

Here is my problem - I love Ta'Vaalor and I'm planning to move there.

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If you had started your note off with "I love Ta'Vaalor and want my husband and I to live there," this would not have been a simple decision. But you said "I am planning" - not "I want to plan," or "I want US to plan" - get the point? You have already made the decision with or without your husband's blessing. Remember as you say goodbye to your husband though - the grass isn't always greener and sometimes you get stuck with all the fire ants.

R
reg